But I Need My Foot to Walk!!

I've come to a horrible realization. I will have to have surgery this year. I thought I had dodged a bullet. But I know now that the bullet was apparently more of a boomerang. It can be dodged, but it will always turn around and hit me square in the ass. Or I guess the foot.

About a year ago, my foot started to hurt. Not a ton, but enough that I noticed it. I didn't think of the pain too much. Every once in a while, I'd feel a twinge of something and look down. It wasn't until a little while into the process that I noticed my foot was becoming more and more deformed by a Tailor's Bunion. In early October, I finally bit that bullet and went to the Podiatrist. My WebMd diagnosis was correct. Tailor's Bunion. It was a bit inflamed and filled with fluid. So I gritted my teeth and got shot up with cortisone. The doctor said it should help with the inflammation for a while, but it would come back. He mentioned orthodics (which I'd like to thank United Health Care for NOT covering...appreciate that), but I couldn't afford the $600+ for the possibility that it might lessen the pain...a little bit. So I bought a few orthodics from Target and some bunion pads from Walgreens and went along my merry way.

Six months later, I was back in the doctor's office. I actually felt pretty good about it. I thought six months was a good amount of time. When the doc saw me again, he said the next step would be surgery. I'm sorry...what?? But I don't wanna have surgery!! The non-graphic story is that they'd slice into my foot, reposition the bone and shove some screws into the toe. I'd be off of my foot for one week, then I'd sport a boot for 4 weeks. So, 5 weeks of recovery time.

My first thought was, "But I have a travel schedule this year!!" And my second thought was, "The first shot lasted 6 months, I should be good through the Ireland trip!!" Yay!! Nothing to worry about!! Famous last words...

The cortisone shot was given and while the pain went away quickly the first time, it didn't help at all the second time. Not a good sign. So I waited...and waited...and waited. Eventually, the foot stopped hurting and I went along my merry way. I went to South America and didn't think about my foot one bit. Until a few weeks ago...

A few weeks ago, I noticed that the pain was back. Literally, about 2 months since the shot. I thought I could power through it a bit. At first, the foot hurt when it was inside shoes. Then, it hurt if I poked at the bunion. Now...it hurts all the time. Oh, this can't be a good sign.

The thing is, I don't wear crazy shoes. I'm not a girl that drools over shoes. I just don't care. I appreciate cute shoes, but I never got all hot and bothered over a gorgeous pair of shoes. So my feet aren't falling apart from poor shoe-decisions. I wear Converse. Almost every day. Converse!! They can't be causing problems!!

I had an appointment this week to get another shot. The problem was that I knew I was going to discuss surgery. And I was dreading it. I don't think I'm actually dreading the surgery (though I can't imagine it'll be fun). I'm dreading the rest. It'll be a week of me sitting on the couch, "working from home." It'll be four weeks of the boot. It'll be me depending on someone (Mom!!) during the week of staying off of my foot. I'm not used to that anymore. I do ask for help at times, but 98% of the time, I'm all about independence and not counting on anyone for help (I'm sure that's probably the cause of all kinds of mental weirdness, but there you have it). So having someone to help with food or taking care of me in any way...this is way outside of my comfort zone.

But the biggest issue is that I do have two trips planned during the remainder of the year. And neither one would be best served with me hobbling along with a mighty boot. So I have a small window of time that I could schedule a surgery...

Post-Ireland/Pre-Stealthy Trip (the Stealthy Trip could actually be considered the "Trip Which Shall Not Be Named" for reasons that work on several levels) - There are 5.5 weeks between these trips. If I did get the surgery right after I got back from Ireland, it might work. But if there are any complications, I don't have much recovery time. Unless I want to be walking around with a boot during the TWSNBN. Knowing where we're going, it would be traumatic.

Post-TWSNBN would work, but it also means I'll live 4 more months in pain. And it also throws a boot on me during Thanksgiving. But most of all, it gets me into Winter with the boot. I already worry about walking/handling myself in Chicago. To add the Winter elements to the mix...difficult.

If I can't schedule the surgery before the end of the year, I'm hosed until probably April of next year. (Winter, then Pompeii, then...well, there's always a "then"). By then, I'll probably have already amputated my foot due to the pain. I can't imagine that'll go well.

Someone from the Doctor's office is supposed to call me tomorrow. I don't want to have the conversation. But at least I'll know how long I'll have to wait. It's going to be a long day tomorrow. A very long day...


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